The One-Night-Stand that Wasn't

In usual Johnny-come-lately fashion, I'm only just reading the Gawker hit piece on Christine O'Donnell. To me it starts off as a "Dear Penthouse" letter but ends up falling completely flat, literally and figuratively. In an efforts to hurt or insult O'Donnell, this man (can we even call him a man?), decides to describe a one-night-stand that actually didn't happen. Can you say LAME? My goodness, where do I even begin?

1. If you didn't have sex, it's NOT a one-night-stand.
2. You're trying to smear O'Donnell but it really makes you look bad. Very bad. You constantly commented on how much she had ahd to drink yet you also say that you had around the same amount. Who's to say that you were performing well under par yourself?
3. You have LESS respect for her for being a "born again virgin". Is that saying that you would have kept your mouth shut had she actually put out, or would you have put out just as salacious a piece if she had? And if nothing sexual happened, then how would there be any "nitty gritty" to get down to?
4. She's not a "cougar" if she didn't mess with you on the basis of how much younger you were than her. She probably wasn't even fully aware of the age difference. Get over yourself.
5. You make it a point to call attention to the fact that she hadn't "landscaped". I'm sorry, buddy, but not every woman feels compelled to have her nether regions resemble that of an adolescent girl. Again, that calls attention to what kind of mindset you most probably have.
6. You appear to be so disgusted with her that she didn't give in to your advances while under the influence that you decide not to call her after. Quite immature and caddish, don't you think?
7. Is it really any of your business whether or not O'Donnell and your roommate had sex when they were dating? Let me answer this for you, NO.
8. Are you so ridiculously immature that somewhere in your mind you would think that because she did not put out for you and because you care little to nothing for her that she should not deserve to win the primary?

I could honestly lose my breath picking apart this joke but I think this about sums it up.